Me. You.

You play the dumb. I play the happy one. We play our roles so convincingly that we truly are a dumb and a happy one. But neither you are a dumb nor I am a happy one.

These are just the heavy coats we wear to protect our inner, fragile, tender secret. This disgust for life that makes us vulnerable and sweetly pained. Offenders and victims. Fallacious and deluded.

We are unable to hear each other's voice, unable to touch each other's face, standing at opposite sides on the verge of the same crater open in front of our feet. Each busy with his own dying. Don't tend your hand towards me, I cannot hold it.

In a blink of an eye, we recognised our selves from the windows of two trains running fast on parallel rails. In opposite directions.

Summer night

Sometimes I wish my house was next to a lake, to hear the cry of frogs during the night. Like those summers I spent, as a young girl, at the sea. The window of my bedroom was left open at night, to catch any slight passage of fresh air slipping down from the close hills.

Those were the good times when no air conditioning existed, and windows still served as channels of percolation between sleep and the outer - vigilant - world. The harsh steps of a night walker in the street, the crackle of a tree hit by a blow of sea breeze, or, indeed, the crispy lullaby sung by frogs gathered in the garden nextdoor. Their melancholic song gently cradled my dreams, while my body rested among white linen sheets. The skin still burning from the sun of a day spent on the seashore.

Conosci Patrizia?

http://www.women.it/les/poesia/cav.htm

In bed

- I don't understand why you don't send me to fuck off... what do you find in me?

- In you, I see something that belongs to me.

- I am fed up...

- Fed up with what?

- Fed up... mmhhh...

- Fed up with...

- Don't say that!

- Fed up with life?!

- You seem to be such a happy person. Are you happy?

- ...

- No, you are not. I see you are not happy now.

- You are too intelligent and funny... you would break me down into pieces.

- Yeah. That's why you like me.

Alchimia epidermica

Ti ho riconosciuto dal profumo. Prima ancora del tuo abbraccio, l'odore potente della tua pelle mi ha posseduta. Il mio cervello si è attivato - reazione chimica innescata per l'olfatto. Sei tu.

Zucchero e limone, zafferano e caramello. Stordita da quel tuo profumo, ti ho seguito.

Potenza dei sensi, niente ha avuto più importanza. Colpe, rimorsi, timori, non avevano più definizione nel mio vocabolario. Toccare il tuo corpo, esplorarti, assaggiare i tuoi spazi, solo questo aveva ragione di esistere. L'essenza additiva emanata dalla tua pelle è divenuta aria da respirare, acqua da bere, nutrimento da assimilare.

Ancora imbevuta del tuo umore, ti ho lasciato. Eppure, segretamente, ancora indosso due gocce di te al mio risveglio.

Ticked off

from my bed and from my thoughts.

Getting ready

to have you.

Una della cose migliori della mia vita IV

Meine Liebe Wien

How I wish you were here, tonight

So, so you think you can tell, Heaven from Hell, Blue skys from pain.

Can you tell a green field From a cold steel rail? A smile from a veil?

Do you think you can tell? And did they get you to trade Your heros for ghosts?

Hot ashes for trees? Hot air for a cool breeze? Cold comfort for change?

And did you exchange A walk on part in the war For a lead role in a cage?

How I wish, how I wish you were here.

We're just two lost souls Swimming in a fish bowl, Year after year, Running over the same old ground. What have we found? The same old fears.

Wish you were here.

[Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here, Radiohead cover]

Di notte

Ho il desiderio che mi rende insonne. Una fame che rimorde nelle viscere fino a svegliarmi nel mezzo della notte, per annotare su questo quaderno i sintomi di una febbre che non passa.